Sunday, 30th November 2008

wad is more impt? her happiness, or mine? its a difficult qn hor? sometimes, ppl like to sae that to be happy make ur loved ones happy.but wad if...u're not in the process of making ur loved ones happy? sometimes...i do realli feel miserable.emo.i dunno wad is right.

she's always giving way to me.like when i sae i have off on the last wk of dec and when she says she's willing to cancel her trekking trip for me? i dunno to feel happy or wad.on one hand, i want to spend tym wif her.on the other hand, i'm thinking if it is out of pity for me or if she's just worried that i'm unhappy. n i noe she wans to go.argh.

there's lots in my mind that i dunno how to sae.u noe...in drama...love is always depicted as sthg so sweet and simple.as they sae "to love is to noe when to let go" i tink its true.another saying says that love is "to see the other one happy". both suggests letting the other party enjoy herself.let her do the things she enjoy most.even if it may not be the best of interest to u.its telling us to be generous with our love and not being selfish and narrow minded. but yet...another school thot says: "do wad u deem is right." YES! this wld make me happier in some cases! say no to this i no to that! say U MUST DO THIS! I WANT THIS! i would be happier to some extent wldnt i? i wonder if that's realli so...haiz.

it sux to tink so much hor.i want to be just like her.simple minded.not tink so much. be happy! do the things she like. but i can't.cuz it scares me how selfish i would become...arghhhhhh!

army do make ppl weird.or izit just me?





Saturday, 15th November 2008

WEEKENDS ARE SOOOOOO BORINGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!! someone pls go out wif me pls...i'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo BORED!





Thursday, 6th November 2008

YAY! tmr's an off day! freedom! but not exactly a taste of it after a long time.anyway...the past few days in camp was SUPER slack.had lots of private time to myself.do things i like.gym, run, etc. yea...it was good. sometimes i realli love time in camp. (:

dear dear's exams are coming so soon.on the 24th.and she's got no time to pei me. sad.and haven been going out wif her for so so long.no doubt i did meet her for supper and stuff...but it was realli realli short period of time and i couldnt realli enjoy myself wif her.unlike the good old times when she was so free on the weekends.now, the bulk of her weekends are mostly dedicated to studying.oh wells...but can't realli blame her for it.its the university anw.work, work and more work is part of the 4 years.oh wells. i tried to be there for her, when she's studying i'll accompany her, but after sometime i realli do get bored...cuz there's realli nth much for me to do.but realli...i wanna do sthg for her.be there for her.but how? anyone can teach me how to keep myself entertained when she's studying without being a distraction to her? =(

u noe...sometimes i daydream.in this dream there's a beautifully painted picture of me and dear dear. we're in a room.a room in my house.a very very special room.its a very quiet room that can only been located by me and dear dear. it have doors that can lead us to many many places in the world and these places are empty-there're no other people except us.

in the room there's a tv.and lots and lots of dvds stacked beside it.in front of the tv there's a bed.and on the bed are me and dear dear watching drama serials and movies tgt.and when we're tired, we'll cuddle each other and fall asleep.

in another corner of the room there's a kitchen.and in this kitchen there is a huge fridge, cupboards filled with all kinds of ingredients, ovens, plates, cutlery, etc. when we're hungry we'll wake up and cook for each other.something nice and full of flavour.full of love.and when u eat it, it'll burst with so much warmth and emotions that you'll burst out with tears of joy.yum yum.

after we've eaten.we decided to visit the beach.we pack our stuff and open the door labelled "beach". we stepped foot onto golden sand.the wind is blowing strongly onto our faces, carrying with it the sound of the roaring waves.the sun is basking its rays onto us as tho it was long awaiting our arrival.we threw all our things aside and run towards the sea and splashed water at each other.swim around.tan.

soon it's nightfall.the moon is round and bright.we're tired and hungry.we pitched a tent along the shores and sat in the tent.we brought out our instant bbq pit and set it up just outside the tent and began bbq-ing food for our dinner.we made marshmallows for each other and fed each other.we chit-chat.talk about almost everything.and when we're done, we stepped back into the room.

this room unlocks unlimited boundaries that we can go to.anywhere we want to go to we can go. FUN. and most importantly...its some realli private quality time tgt.

haiz...but still...its a dream...how can it ever happen?haha.

anyway...i hope that my dear dear can get thru her torturous exams fast and quick.spare her the torture.and so that she can quickly go for her treks and spend more time wif me.i missed her presence terribly. =(





Sunday, 12th October 2008

ooooohhhhh... haven blogged for such a long long tym. and did i mention, taiwan's R&R was such a blast. totally loved it! the shopping and all! haha. shall go there another tym with dear dear if i have the opportunity.=))

so...finally! goodbye to gedong! and HELLOOOOO to pasir laba! =))finally got my 3SG rank.big fuck now alr huh.haha.not realli la.haha.but well...hope life wld be slack.=]next wk i wld be on block leave.whole wk until 20th except monday the 13th.oh well...dunno whether to burst out in tears or to jump with joy and exhilaration.cuz my encik said this: "for ppl going to MSU, after 2pm on monday...you all can go home.you have to report to your unit only on the 20th.don worry about your leave...it had alr been approved and CLEARED" and he continued saying: "some of you have no more leave.some only have 1, at the most 2." yea yea...thank you encik. =.=" FUCK LA. anyhow clear! i wanted to go somewhere wif dear dear in dec one lei! nxt few wks can't even go overseas wif her cuz she's having exams.busy mugging.how to? =(

speaking of dec...dear dear wld be away for nearly the whole month. 5 treks.=( she's pretty excited and happy abt going...but she'll come back complaining.ha.RIGHT HOR DEAR? so fun can. i'll miss her! =[

ahhhh...don tink abt tt yet.just enjoy dear's company b4 december. oh oh! 26th october's coming! 2 more wks! ^.^ ^.^ ^.^





29th August 2008

gonna fly today alr...for taiwan...and well...god noes why this is still a secret but anyways...my frens, family and dear shld noe where i'm gonna be for the nxt 3 wks.oh man...so emo.

this few wks didnt manage to spend tym wif dear. firstly was i had to replace shaun for guard duty 2 saturdays ago...then tt sunday i went crazy over some lame stuff and made dear dear unhappy.=( in the end didnt go out. last wkend dear went to kota tinggi for a trek.altho it was onli one day...i guess she wld be so tired by the tym she's back.so didnt go out again. just loitered ard her void deck and talk.oh wells...tinking back...realli hadnt spent tym properly wif dear for a long long tym alr.and plus i was emo all the tym and saying nasty things.oh man.but wells...so glad tt had such a good tym wif dear ytd! =))

we went comex exhibition and bought a camera for my taiwan trip! then we went kushin-bo for a sumptous dinner! oh man...damn shiok can! and we played wif ice-cream...haha...took videos of one another smashing scoops of ice-cream on each other's nose.haha.then we caught wallie at 9.30 before sending dear dear home.wallie was damn nice can. nice storyline and it was rather touching at certain parts. yesterday was the best date ever in such a long time.i couldnt bear to leave dear after reaching her place.=(

today i spent most of my day at nus...keeping dear company for her lectures and had lunch wif her at "the best canteen in nus" haha.that's wad my darling said.haha. oh man...leaving in 6 hrs.gonna miss singapore, my family and esp. dear dear so so much...=((( sobs.

dear! deng wo hui lai!





Sunday, 17th August 2008

haha.baby...this blog's has almost like become dedicated to you alr.most of my entries are abt you.haha.

baby...i'm sorry.for saying those hurtful words...for making u cry...for making you feel bad. baby...i'm immature, ignorant, selfish, stupid, unreasonable...u name it, i have it. sorry for hurting you yea? i want to be wif u forever, just like wad i wanted when i asked u to be my girlfriend.dunno whether if u would see this but anw yea...i realli love u lots.

i dunno why i'm acting liddat recently.probably cuz i'm not used to not having u beside me for the weekends.probably cuz throughout the almost 10 months tgt...i've been spending almost every single possible day of it wif you.perhaps i've taken for granted that your weekends are mine, such that when u told me u're going to malaysia nxt wkend b4 i'm flying for taiwan, i made such a big fuss over it.

i take back every single mean thing i said to you my love...i'm so sorry. i'll support u in all tt u do...and may our love burn as strongly as ever...<3





25th May 2008

Baby angel!

HAPPY 7 MONTHS!!!!

dearie...hopefully when u see this it wld be tmr...the 26th.but anyway i'm sure even if u read this today...it wld alr be passed 12am.hehe.so yea...considered 7 months when u read this yea? <3

baby dearest...it was a great 7 months wif u.it passed so quickly...probably cuz for the past 5+ months, i had only been able to see u 2 days in a wk.but well...everytym we meet, i wld always estatic upon catching a glimpse of u a distance away...usually at potong pasir mrt.u juz brighten me up, no matter how dull and boring my wk had been. probably tt's wad they call love.and i'm so glad tt i experience this cosy warm feeling wif the first girl i ever fell in love wif in JC. i noe this sounds mushy or cliche...but realli realli...this is how i feel abt u.

baby...i love doing things for you...going all out for you...to surprise u wif every possible means...cuz doing so makes me happy.esp. when i see you smiling,laughing, getting high over things i do, or shld i sae sometimes the stupid things i do.haha. ur every smile and laughter means the world to me.

honey...recent events brought to my attention how much you've always done for me, although u always sae u wan to do more things for me.but darling...7 months and you've been always there for me when i needed you. and i noe many times you've been so tired and worn, but u always try to keep tt sweetest smile on your face whenever you see me.weekends means time for you to rest, to spend wif ur family, but u always leave it vacant for me... baby...these are the things you've always done for me...sacrificing urself for me...and i really really appreciate them all. you sae u've done it willingly...but nevertheless...it really means alot to me.

baby...i love u love u love u! i can't wait to see you the next book-out.you're the best honey...and baby...i've the bar of choc tt u wanted wif me.we'll have it tgt when i'm out. happy 7 months again baby...enjoy ur week and our song... *hugs and kisses*









i love u dearie...till the end of time...<3